I told him to wear a condom – he said I lacked empathy

It baffled me that basic sexual safety was seen as a personality flaw (Picture: Liv Arnold)

‘Can I be inside you?’ Ozan* asked me, while shampooing my hair, in my hotel shower.

‘I’ll feel more comfortable if you use a condom’, I replied hesitantly.

Naturally, I assumed this was a reasonable request – but I didn’t expect his response. 

‘I hate condoms. They don’t feel good. Asking for one shows a lack of empathy. May as well use my hand. If a woman asks, I usually just leave,’ he said.

It baffled me that basic sexual safety was seen as a personality flaw, and I firmly insisted that without a condom there would be no sex. 

In doing so, I exposed him for the type of man he was. 

We rinsed off in silence, then he kissed me on the head and left.<...